Bottom of the Barrel

This shit's for all my boys in the BOB club.


when you're the bottom of the barrel
everything always sucks
you always feel like you're fucked
and you're always shit outta luck
but there might be sumthin' to that
like the fact
that you're not quite fat
but you deffinately don't got
the body that's oh-so-hot
that you trashed your visor
back in the 80s when you were a bit wiser
and you're not on top
of all that is pop
and you don't always dance
like you're in some choregraphed trance
and you don't have to smoke an ounce
so you don't feel like you're allowed
in the basement of your own house
you don't feel the need to rave
to some shitty drum-and-bass
or listen to some dj
who feels the need to claim
that he won't release an LP
or put his shit on CD
'cause that's how he feels
and you know he just can't admit
that he can't get any deals
'cause he ain't got no skills
all this shit pisses you off
makin' you get all feral
but you still feel like you're the bottom of the barrel

this is what it feels like
when you're the bottom of the barrel
when your life's completely barren
but you feel like you're in peril
this is what it feels like
when you're the bottom of the barrel
when you know you can't get laid
so you might as well be sterile

when you're the bottom of the barrel
you don't gotta brag that your dick's 9 inches
'cause you know your ruler's splintered
since you stepped on it while drunk last night
or maybe you broke it in that fight
when your dad started yellin' 'bout you bein' drunk
tryin' to ut your nappy hair and callin' you a punk
now you're getting kicked out for the third time this month
and it's the second time this week
things were looking down
now they're just plain bleak
then daddy points out you're white and can't rap this
daddy's white too, but he don't call his crap shit
lock yourself in your room and you're gettin' drunk alone
mommy's on the phone
callin' the cops who're gonna make you gone
sittin' in the jail trynna bide your time
some pig points out white kids can't rhyme
so you're stuck sittin' in jail
and you still feel like the bottom of the barrel

this is what it feels like
when you're the bottom of the barrel
when your life's completely barren
but you feel like you're in peril
this is what it feels like
when you're the bottom of the barrel
when you know you can't get laid
so you might as well be sterile

when you're the bottom of the barrel
you still go to the club but
you still can't get no love but
it sure helps to have this vodka
a few hours later you're gettin' all hazey
the shitty dj's makin' you listen to jay-z
all this shit's eatin' at you and makin' you crazy
you try and dance with the bitch with teh double D chest
and she's got a boyfriend who was just at rest
he didn't much like how you were grabbin' her breasts
he goes off and the bouncers throw you outside
somwhere you lost your keys so you can't drive
and you ain't got no ride
'cause your boy's still inside
trynna get his dick in the backside
of some bitch who looks like a man
so you've just gotta stand
around outside for as long as you can
then Double-D's boyfriend came out and found ya
and you're so trashed you just let him pound ya
a coupla cops come to break up the fight
but they remember you from last night
and in your have these two seem even burlier
so you get it twice as bad as you did earlier
and while you're bleeding there all
you know is you'er the bottom of the barrel

this is what it feels like
when you're the bottom of the barrel
when your life's completely barren
but you feel like you're in peril
this is what it feels like
when you're the bottom of the barrel
when you know you can't get laid
so you might as well be sterile
this is what it feels like
when you're the bottom of the barrel
when your life's completely barren
but you feel like you're in peril