the amazing flying bedroom

begin true story here. i woke up at 5:12 AM. my house was ABSOLUTELY silent. i've NEVER heard my house this silent. there was no noise coming from outside. no music coming from other rooms. no televisions were on. no snoring or talking of anybody. everyone was asleep in the house at 5:12 AM. but that's not what i thought. i thought the world was gone. i thought everything had disappeared and all that was left was my house, floating in space. i was afraid to look through my blinds. i was afraid to open my door. i was out of kool-aide. after about ten minutes, i decided to check. thankfully, there was a house outside my door. so i made more kool-aide and put it in my room. i went the bathroom. i grabbed some chips to put in my room. i never looked out the windows though. maybe the house had flown into space. i didn't want to discover that just yet. end true story here.

begin alternate story here. i woke up at 5:12 AM. my house was ABSOLUTELY silent. i've NEVER heard my house this silent. there was no noise coming from outside. no music coming from other rooms. no televisions were on. no snoring or talking of anybody. everyone was asleep in the house at 5:12 AM. but that's not what i thought. i thought the world was gone. i thought everything had disappeared and all that was left was my house, floating in space. i was afraid to look through my blinds. i was afraid to open my door. i was out of kool-aide. after about ten minutes, i decided to check. unfortunately, there was no house outside my door. so i made summoned some monkey servants to do my biddings. i went to the moon. i had sex with seven attractive females ghosts (with their pubes died pink) all at the same time. i was glad my house was gone and did not want it to return. then i wanted to return. i flew the room back to the house. then i went back to sleep. end alternate story here.