eligible bachelor.

life is dieing
slowly, slowly dieing

the kind of dieing where you're sad, not because your "crush" is unattainable, but because your crush is unexistant. you've recently left a wonderful relationship (only saying good bye days ago) and you've accepted the finality. the point in which you are most desirable. you've no prospects to speak of, so any possiblities seak you out.

you've got the ex with whom you shared a great relationship. things have changed though. a relationship probably wouldn't work out.
you've got the ex with whom you had nothing in common. the one you used as a rebound for a different ex. the one you dated because they wanted you, and if you dated them now, it'd be for the same reason.
you've got the new person, the one that wants you although they have no reason to. they don't know you and you don't know them. getting into a relationship may be a good thing, but should probably not happen yet.
you've got the ex whom you dated and ended on good terms with. the relationship simply ended so you could be friends again. the was no real reason the relationship couldn't have worked out. likewise, the was no real reason the relationship would have worked out. additionally, there is no way of knowing what a new relationship would bring.

so i ask, how eligible am i? 4 women with desires to be with me. 4 women i could most likely tolerate being with. 0 women i desire to be with. 0 women i wish to torment with my disdain for unintimate relationships.

she returned the good bye tonight. i'll not likely speak to her again. i may see her around. she'll never leave my memory. perhaps, someday i will pay her a visit and suprise her. someday when i'm happily committed to a different woman. someday when she's happily committed to a different man. we'll laugh together, remembering the times we spent together and we'll then return to our lives seperately. afterwards, nothing will be different, but we'll both be a little bit happier knowing the other is happy. i'll return to my seat among the clouds. she'll return to her home alongside the stars.

"watch the sky for me. watch the night for me. i'll be there, for you, in star light."