relationship relativity

so, today was extremely abnormal and i liked it. i got 4 horror movies to add to my collection, free, of course. i met my mom's boyfriend's daughter. i watched jason goes to hell (jason X comes out next friday) and that sucked (as a movie). i got 2 free meals from my mom and had a good time hanging out with her. 7 people wanted to hang out with me after i'd already made plans to go to Delta Chi's formal. no, i'm not a delta chi member, but i almost was. well, i went with an "alternative dressed-up look." and i think i looked damn fine. either way, all the women were flirting with me, becuase all the delta-chis were talking about was fraternity shit and i talked about human shit, so they were more interested in my conversations. so states my theory. i talked to tory on the phone. that actually went decently well, i've not spoken to her in quite a while and it was good just to hear her voice. we agreed that we could never live near each other simply because of the past we shared. she thinks the new ordeal with her ex (he's asking his new girlfriend to move in with him) is because of the karmatic backlash from the her-me relationship. i think he's just asking his new girlfriend to move in and the him-her relationship is not related to the me-her relationship, except by similarities perceived for the sake of her self-preservation. it helps her feel as though she's been punished for the guilt she feels over ending our relatioinship. someone i've talked to a lot recently, but probably won't speak to nearly as much anymore, brought to my attention that i always make myself sound like a victim in my past relationships. now would be a good time (since tory apparently feel that the end of her-me is totally her fault) to state that i do not find myself the victim in most relationships. the reason you would perceive such is because i often bring up the negative aspects of previous relationships for comparison to current relationships in an attempt to prevent previous problems from arrising. as i said i believe about tory's him-her in relation to tory's her-me, they're not related. the person i've spoken to recently also made me realize that my previous relationships are not related to my new ones. assuming i can prevent certain mishaps with a current female-friend by using methods that would've worked on a previous female friend is wrong. it may work some of the time, but likewise, those problems may have never arrissen and i may have taken unnecessary steps to prevent them, which may in turn lead to the overlooking of existing problems. what this all means: i am alive right now and thus need to live right now, not in the past. thank you person I spoke to a bunch about all of thIs stuff even If you dIdn't realIze then that I was more than lIstenIng. yes, I'm here. sorry If I don't say anythIng, but I feel that thIs long pause In your words Is worthy of sIlence.